Funnies

More funnies or huhs from rumination.com

"Why do people end up in their parent's basements? What happened to their rooms they used in childhood?

It's funny how people would consider drinking human breast milk beyond their infant stage to be disgusting, but will drink the breast milk of another species for their entire life.

Why don't guys ever suck at singing? It's either good enough or surprisingly great. Of the girls I know, maybe two are amazing, the rest of us sound like drunken seagulls, and there's always one who can only be described as a serial ear murderer.

Hockey has twenty minute periods. I'm so fucking jealous.

I'm sorry, I'm not trying to stare down your family, but your baby keeps smiling at me and I don't want to be rude to it.

Hair ties only exist in one size... the size where if you don't loop it enough, it's too loose, but if you loop it just one more time, it's too tight.

The definition of a comfortable relationship is when you eat the same way around each other as you do alone.

Bananas are one of my favorite fruits, so how come everything banana flavored tastes worse than licking the bottom of someone's shoe.

It was much more comforting when my computer took 20 seconds to save something and gave me the hourglass, versus the nonchalance it shows now. "You are saving this final thesis, right?"

I want to start a pizza franchise with $4 Hot 'n Ready pizzas. It'll be called "Little Brutus: The Caesar Killer."





AND . . . a few random quotes I found elsewhere:
Sometimes I lie awake at night and ask why me? Then a voice answers nothing personal, your name just happened to come up.
Charles M. Schulz

Sometimes I lie awake at night, and ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night.'
Charles M. Schulz



Read more: http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/c/charles_m_schulz.html#ixzz1IhR3kmEb